I don’t want to write about this. I’m not “qualified”, I’m not an expert, and I’m not well-versed in the nuance of the issue, all of which leaves me feeling as though my thoughts aren’t valid. I’m a middle-class white woman who doesn’t watch sports. And yet. The noise in my head is so loud, so distracting, that I must write about it, if only selfishly for my own sanity. So here we are.

Even though spectating most professional sports isn’t my jam, I casually followed the Colin Kaepernick story last year. I admired the players who were using their platform to bring attention to inequities and injustices that exist within our society. They are real and they are significant. But after President Trump’s remarks on Friday evening, I’ve spent the last few days thinking deeply about the subject, reading a number of articles of varying opinions, with hopes of gaining a better understanding of my own. What I’ve been unable to do is watch the “rants” posted to social media. I’ll read an article, watch a reasoned conversation, but I am done watching people rage into the camera. My experience is that these only resonate with people who agree with the ranter and do nothing to advance discourse. And they’re exceptionally annoying.

As I’ve followed the dialogue, a number of themes have emerged from those who are critical of the act of kneeling during the national anthem. 1. The players who kneel are unpatriotic. 2. The players who kneel are disrespectful to our military. 3. The players who kneel should stay in their lane – stick to playing football and keep their politics/social justice efforts off the field. 4. The players who are kneeling are ungrateful. (They’re millionaires – what do they have to complain about?)

On Patriotism

According to dictionary.com a patriot is: 1. a person who loves, supports, and defends his or her country and its interests with devotion. 2.a person who regards himself or herself as a defender, especially of individual rights, against presumed interference by the federal government. 3.a U.S. Army antiaircraft missile with a range of 37 miles (60 km) and a 200-pound (90 kg) warhead, launched from a tracked vehicle with radar and computer guidance and fire control. (I’m going to ignore the third definition here, as I hope it’s clear that no one is referring to a antiaircraft missile in this dialogue.) Nowhere in the multiple definitions I read does it discuss HOW one acts as a patriot-how someone “loves, supports or defends” the country. There are no guidelines, no requirements which leaves it up to each of us to craft our own image of how a patriot behaves, what one looks like.

In a country as diverse as ours, it makes sense that there would  be a multitude of ideas about how one acts as a patriot. For some, a patriot is one who stands faithfully for our anthem, someone who dutifully supports the president and his (or her) administration, someone who doesn’t question the authority of the police. For others, myself included, the act of protest is patriotic. Standing up for the rights of others, calling out injustice, clamoring for change are acts that are woven into the fabric of our history. Much of the progress made in our society has advanced in part because of protest – the woman’s right to vote, advances in civil liberties, the end of the Vietnam war. Without individuals willing to put themselves on the line, to agitate and make noise, so much of what we take for granted would not be possible. People in power are often not remotely interested in sharing it. It takes tremendous pressure for meaningful change to take place. Horrendous inequalities still exist within our country, and our past suggests that progress won’t be made without people making noise in the proverbial streets.

Snubbing the Military

As the wife of an Air Force reservist, I find the comments about the athletes taking a knee disrespecting the military particularly agitating. I don’t need anyone to speak on my or my husband’s behalf, to assume what actions disrespect us. I’m far more offended by the government’s attempt to take healthcare away from thousands of people than I am a bunch of athletes making a silent protest. Besides, ideologically, military members are as diverse as our country. I’m sure there are more than a few military members and veterans who are offended by those who kneel for our anthem. I’m also certain there are a great many who are not. Let’s not pretend that the military is some monolithic group who’s feelings need protecting.

Lastly, when people join the service, the oath they take is to protect the constitution, not the flag. This is an important distinction, as I’ve seen multiple references to the military’s defense of our flag which is factually incorrect.

Football Only Please

“Stay in your lane” is a statement used in an attempt to put someone in their place. I see it used in regards to Jimmy Kimmel as he speaks about healthcare-a topic that has deeply impacted his family, and I see it used in an attempt to silence the athletes. At first blush, I understand what people mean. They want entertainers to entertain, not distract with “real world” conversation and politics. But upon further thought, that doesn’t make any sense. None of us live in a vacuum. We can’t separate our lives into neat little boxes. Frankly, I think we should all use whatever platform we have to advance conversations and issues that are important to us. Do some people have bigger platforms, larger audiences? Without a doubt. If those people-actors, athletes, musicians, etc-use their given platform for advocacy, and they have their employer’s support, then as far as I’m concerned the case is closed. They don’t need anyone else’s permission. The consent the rest of us provide is watching their show, watching the game, buying the music. If someone is that bothered by the message and the advocacy, walk away. But to expect that individual’s employer, a NFL team owner in this case, to share one’s belief system or one’s expectations about what a player should or shouldn’t do is unreasonable. If enough people aren’t buying the thing-watching football in this case-the owners then get to re-evaluate, but still might make the same decision. That’s on them.

Trump’s comments on Friday night were a very loud “stay in your lane” remark. By referring to the players as “sons of bitches” and stating they should be fired, he brought the government into the conversation, in a way that feels inappropriate. The first amendment protects our right to speak freely. This amendment does not protect our speech from our employers (it is protection from the government’s abridging that right), meaning the NFL owners could do as some NASCAR team owners did and require their athletes to stand for the anthem at games, but that’s not for the government to determine. It’s also impossible to ignore the realities of a white president calling these athletes, who are predominantly African-American, SOBs. I’ve read multiple places that “this has nothing to do with race” but there’s nothing to prove that it doesn’t. And the responsibility always lies with those in power, which in this case is Trump who is not only president, but a white man. It’s on him to ensure that his language is clear enough for us all to know his true intent.

Lastly, what happened to Michael Bennett of the Seattle Seahawks a few weeks ago confirms that this conversation is very much within the lane of a NFL player. Kaepernick initially began kneeling in response to police brutality against African-Americans and minorities. Bennett’s experience in Las Vegas essentially brings the conversation full-circle.

On Gratitude

I really can’t reconcile this one. The implication that these players, because they are millionaires who play a game for a living, should just shut up and be thankful is maddening. From my perspective, the more privilege we have, whether it’s racial privilege, financial, etc, the greater responsibility we have to use that privilege to advance the well-being of others. These players are using what privilege they do have to highlight inequities and facilitate dialogue. Kaepernick himself has paid a significant price for his advocacy, yet it was a price he was willing to pay. The actions of the players who kneel have nothing to do with lack of gratitude for their station in life. One can be grateful and still highlight social injustice (or any other topic). They aren’t mutually exclusive.

There is more to this topic, to this conversation, but this is as far as I’ve gotten in my own thinking. For more reading on the subject, a good friend shared this article earlier Monday, which addresses it far more completely. (Thanks, Troy!) During such tumultuous times, I’m challenging myself to question my own knee jerk reactions to certain situations, of which there seem to be so many these days, and forcing myself develop a deeper understanding of why I think what I do. This post is essentially a verbal vomit of my own grapplings with this particular one. I acknowledge that my perspective will likely continue to evolve, as none of us should be static in our thinking.

Rumination tends to be eased if we learn to be mindful; if we are able to be aware of, and understand how our own thoughts work. ~ Peter Kinderman